I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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