Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
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OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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