Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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