I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
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