whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
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