check it out our google latitudes are spooning
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize