I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
