it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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