its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
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