she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
