week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
