Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Two words: blizzard sex
Randomize
