yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize