Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
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