I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Its about making memories worth repressing
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize
