Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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