i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
the day after is always just damage control
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize
