oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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