i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
