so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
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