sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize
