Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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