omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
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