Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Magyver!
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
