you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Randomize