actually, I'm a sock model
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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