he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
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i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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