BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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