sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Randomize
