I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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