would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
home. puking in laundry basket.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
