no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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