R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
