Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
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do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
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My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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