K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Michael Bay diarrhea
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
and i looked up. we had an audience...
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Randomize
