we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Randomize
