Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
