how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
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