scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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