She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize