kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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