Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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