just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
