jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
