Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
