Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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