why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
