Don't you send me to vm
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
They have beer where we have blood.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Randomize
