I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
We need a shit load of segways right now
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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