are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
We had to coat check the pizza.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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