3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
