Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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