Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
